parenting

Good luck to teachers too!

Loving all the back to school photos… another 48hours to go here!
With all the good lucks to all the kids, let’s not forget a big Good Luck to all of the teachers, who are under immense pressure: 

– from ridiculous curriculum changes and education rules and regulations

– from the kids that they don’t want to fail 

– from the parents that they feel that they can’t please no matter how much they do

– and of course from themselves to do a good job.

A normally thankless job, I want to thank teachers for the hours and hours they spend preparing lessons and marking books. For the time they spend tossing and turning at night because they are worried they haven’t done enough to get their kids through their SATS or catch up those kids that may be falling behind. For the time they stress about the children with additional needs that they can’t dedicate enough time to because they don’t have the capacity for more 1-1 attention. For the time they spend worrying a child may be being neglected at home, and even though they have done everything in their power to help, it hasn’t made a difference. For all the stress, the worry and the frustration the year will bring – thank you.
Teacher’s today are so much more than just teachers. They are helping to raise and shape a new generation too. Good luck guys. I’ve tagged a few of you I know here.
If you are thankful for our teachers, please feel free to share this post to let them know. xxx

Early Pregnancy Tests: How early is too early?

I keep seeing an advert on television where two friends are sitting chatting together when one says that she is two weeks pregnant. Her friend asks her if she has been to the doctor yet, and the pregnant lady replies “no, I took this new Clearblue test” .. and sure enough, she holds up the test and it states “Pregnant 1-2 weeks”.

Now I know I may not be very popular for expressing this opinion… particularly as I have not had a miscarriage myself. However I did bleed multiple times during the first 14 weeks of my pregnancy with my oldest child, and know the fear of miscarriage that accompanied every stomach cramp and every occasion of bleeding. I also know plenty of women that have had early miscarriages – literally in the first 6 weeks within finding out that they were pregnant. These friends have naturally and understandably been devastated and my heart goes out to them.

But it has also got me thinking about pregnancy tests. Science and technology has allowed us to find out we are pregnant earlier than ever before. If you think back less than a century, detecting pregnancy was based on old wives tales. In the 1920’s the urine of women who were suspected to be pregnant was injected into immature rats and mice, who would prematurely come into heat if the hormone hCG (which we know to be the hormone detected in current at home tests) was present. Thankfully testing has evolved a lot since then!

In fact it wasn’t until the 1970s that the first proper pregnancy tests came about, no doubt a by-product of the sexual revolution. However, these tests were still performed in laboratories. The first home EPT (Early Pregnancy Test) was launched in the U.S. in 1977.

Research has proven the importance of pre-natal care, particularly in the first trimester of pregnancy when the foetus is rapidly forming. So I can see why some people may feel that detecting pregnancy as early as possible is vital. However, I can’t help but think about the heartache that may be saved in those very early weeks if women simply didn’t know they were pregnant.

As I say, I haven’t had a miscarriage myself – but I remember clearly the first time I started bleeding with my eldest daughter. I was petrified, I cried constantly just waiting for it to be over, convinced I had miscarried. And the sporadic bleeding continued right the way through my first trimester – each time bringing with it a fresh wave of fear and heartbreak.

I have to wonder how many women could be spared that trauma, just by finding out that they were pregnant just a few weeks later. The NHS website states that “A miscarriage in the first few weeks can start like a period, with spotting or bleeding and mild cramps or backache”. If a woman didn’t know she was pregnant, surely she would just assume she was having a late period – as is so common anyway. Emotionally, wouldn’t it be far easier to accept a late period than a miscarriage?

Miscarriages are an unfortunate but common occurrence in early pregnancy, and almost always happen due to there being something wrong with the development of the foetus or another medical reason, and they cannot be prevented. However, if I was given the choice of knowing I was pregnant early and then suffering a miscarriage, or not knowing I was pregnant and then suffering a miscarriage – I know which I would prefer. For me, I would prefer to save the heartache that accompanies miscarriage.

Unfortunately I believe that these ultra-early detection pregnancy tests have the potential to increase the number of recognised miscarriages among women today, and personally I’m just not convinced that the benefit of knowing you are pregnant a couple of weeks earlier is really a benefit at all.

I would be interested to know your thoughts too. Would you rather know you had a miscarriage in the very first weeks of pregnancy, or would you prefer to avoid the heartbreak? How early is too early?

With Love

Dee

xoxox

A star is born! 

Well technically she was born in 2006, but still… That’s right, our 9yr old is a star!

Tonight was her drama school’s latest production, and her second time performing with them. All of the kids were outstanding. Flawless lines, hilarious and convincing acting, maturity beyond their years. 

Absolutely proud as anything tonight. So lovely to see the confidence and personality oozing out of them!

Sadly the drama school is taking s break until the summer due to funding problems, but Liv can’t wait to go back as soon as they start up again!

I’ll leave you with a picture of our Liv (left) and her best friend Lillie 

Dee xoxo 

  

Why I hate being a parent #1

Today I hate being a parent. In fact, the truth is there are lots of days I hate being a parent and anyone that isn’t full of bullshit will attest to the fact that there are lots of days that the bad parts of parenting outweigh the good. That’s why I have titled this one #1… I fully expect there to be many more to follow.

So why do I hate being a parent today I hear you ask. Simply because, I feel like shit. This morning I woke up with a bit of a sore throat, but generally didn’t feel too bad. And this morning was great, I took the kids and my friends daughter to the cinema. The kids were brilliantly behaved and enjoyed the film. Life was grand.

However since coming home my sore throat has turned into a throat full of razor blades, a painful head full of cotton wool, a stiff neck, aching legs and a desire to curl up on the sofa under a blanket and sleep. However I am mum, and mum is not allowed to be sick.

To be honest I don’t feel like this often. Do you know how I know? Because when I ask my kids to sit quietly this afternoon and either read/play on tech/watch a film, they look at me like I have an alien crawling out of my head. At this point I don’t have the energy to check if I actually have.

I hate being a parent because you aren’t allowed to be ill. Within the last 5 minutes alone I have asked the kids to keep the noise down no less than 14 times. Yes they are sitting down playing together but do they have to shriek like a banshee whilst they are doing it? Invariably one of them will annoy the other and I will have to intervene and stretch my already breaking voice to shout at them to leave eachother the hell alone.

Worse still, I am a self-employed parent, which means I can’t take time off work when I am sick either. I have multiple deadlines to meet within the next few days, and I am currently harnessing the creativity and motivation of a dung beetle.

So that, ladies, gentlemen and fellow owners of small, feral creatures (aka kids), is why I hate being a parent today. hey, at least I’m honest about it!

 

What a mum really feels when her kids go back to school

This week, up and down the country armies of parents will be cheering as their little bundles of joy will be returning to school! It follows 6(ish!) weeks of wonderful bonding time with them – and of course playing referee between them and their siblings 24/7! No doubt they have eaten them out of house and home, made too much noise, too much mess and not listened to what they were told. They have probably uttered the b-word at least 3 times each day … “Muuuuuum I’m BORED”. So yes, it’s a blessed relief when, for 6 hours of each day, they are someone else’s responsibility! 

I’ll be one of those mums tomorrow. Have you seen that YouTube video of the monkey dancing? If not it’s here: Monkey dance!

That will be me… All the way back to the car! 

But…. Whilst I’m dancing on the outside there will be a little piece of me that is lost on the inside. A tiny, microscopic piece of my heart gets chipped away each time they return to school because it means that they are one step closer to growing up. 

Don’t get me wrong, I know every day is a day older, a day more independent etc, but the first day back is a milestone. Another year further on in their education, another year of expectations of them to do well. Another year of them learning to be independent which, although I know they need to do, makes me worried about the time that they won’t need me so much anymore. 

Another year of worrying that they are happy in school, that they have good friends, that they aren’t being bullied and that they aren’t afraid to be themselves. 

So when you look at me, the mum on the school gates who is outwardly cheering that her little horrors have gone back to school, know that whilst I might seem heartless and like I’m wishing the years away, on the inside I’m a little sad, worried and emotional too. 

Good luck to all the kiddies who are starting new schools and classes this week, and those simply “going back to school”. I know you’ll do great. 

Dee xoxox 

Kids & Media Device Usage: How much is too much?

It seems kind of fitting that the day I intended to do this blog post, I came downstairs pre-8am to find the kids both sat like this…

kidsmedia

I posted the pic on my personal Facebook page with the caption “peace and quiet sponsored by Nintendo”.

We all know that kids are now exposed more than ever to a wide variety of media devices, and handheld computers like Nintendo 3DS’s are just the tip of the iceberg. From television – which seems almost primitive compared to some technologies – to Xboxes, iPads and Smartphones, most kids have access to one or more of these devices on a regular basis. My 8yr old has a Wii, a Kindle Fire, a Nintendo 3DS and an iPod touch. Oh and a tv/dvd in her room. My five year old has a Kindle Fire, a Nintendo 3DS and will be getting a tv/dvd from Santa this year.

With easy entertainment at the touch of just a few buttons, it is easy to embrace media devices. They are a great way to keep the kids quiet – as demonstrated by my picture this morning – without creating much mess or noise. When it comes to eating out in a restaurant, I almost always take the kids handheld devices so that they have something to keep them occupied if there is a long wait for food. My 8yr old always unwinds with a dvd before bed. The kids both love Minecraft and will happily sit and play it for an hour at a time without moving from their seats.

On the surface it all looks great. Mum/Dad gets some peace and quiet and the kids are kept busy relatively cost and mess free. And there is plenty of evidence that supports that media device usage does indeed have a heap of benefits, particularly in terms of language development. However, there is also evidence to suggest that too much screen-time can actually have a negative impact on some areas of kids lives.

So how much is too much? My friends over at California Cryobank have created the following powerful infographic detailing the pro’s and con’s of children using media devices. Their research clearly illustrates the effect that too much screen time has on our kids health and development. It’s thought-provoking stuff and well worth five minutes of your time to read – hence why I am sharing it with you today.

Feel free to like, share and comment on this infographic from http://www.cryobank.com entitled “The Pro’s and Con’s of Children’s Media Device Usage”.

Thanks for stopping by!

Dee xoxox

 

Keeping the Tooth Fairy Happy: My Guide to Oral Care for Kids

Any parent will tell you that persuading children to brush their teeth can be a difficult task. When there are cartoons to watch and toys to play with, those four minutes a day that your little one needs to spend brushing can seem like an eternity. Children with additional needs, and particularly those with sensory difficulties, can be even harder to convince. However, regular cleaning and teaching them about making good nutritional choices to support their oral care will ensure that they have healthy teeth and gums throughout their childhood. If you want to ensure that your child understands the importance of looking after their teeth then read on for my guide on how to keep your tooth fairy happy and make oral health fun for kids.

First Teeth

Babies may start showing signs of teething from as young as 8 weeks of age, but typically the first tooth shows up between 4 and 8 months. That said, some children cut their first tooth much later – my son was 14 months old – and although rare, some babies are actually born with a tooth! As soon as your baby gets a tooth you should begin the cleaning process. Get them an infant toothbrush to hold and demonstrate to them putting it into their mouths and the actions that they need to make. When you actually brush them, use a tiny smear of fluoride toothpaste. The important thing at this stage is to get them used to brushing their teeth as a part of their daily routine.

If you decide to give your infant a drink in a bottle then always try and give water or milk rather than juice. Bottles encourage prolonged sucking which means that any sugary drink that may be coating the teat/nipple will be in contact with your child’s teeth for an extended period, increasing the likelihood of decay. Teeth are also more at risk at night when there is less saliva to protect them so the sooner your child drops any night-time feeds the better… for your sanity as well as their teeth!

Nutrition

Good nutrition is not only important for your child’s growth and wellbeing, but it also plays a vital part of maintaining good oral health. Here are some basic guidelines for helping your child make the best nutritional choices for their oral health, but for more comprehensive advice please visit: diamondbraces.com/snacking-and-oral-health

Calcium

Calcium is an essential nutrient for developing strong teeth, and works to fortify the adult teeth during childhood.  A glass of milk is a great accompaniment to your child’s snack. Children under the age of 5 are recommended to have full fat or semi-skimmed varieties, whereas older kids can opt for lower fat versions.

The recommended daily allowance of calcium varies dependant on child age. Current guidelines suggest the following:

Children aged 1to 3 : 500mg per day

Children aged 4 to 8 : 800mg per day

Children aged 9 to 18 : 1300mg per day

milk

Snacking

Whilst we frazzled parents believe that our children suck the energy out of us for their own personal use, they also need plenty of snacks to keep them going. Unfortunately a lot of convenient snack items are packed full of salt and sugar, making them far from ideal choice for maintaining healthy teeth, particularly as brushing after snacks is a rare occurrence and sometimes impossible to do. Limiting processed snacks and keeping a supply of healthier, teeth-friendly alternatives is advisable. Raw veggies, complex carbohydrates such as wholegrain toast, and even cubes of cheese are much better alternatives.

Fruit

Fruit always seems like a great choice for a snack as it is usually easy and convenient, and it’s healthy too, right? Yes fruit is a healthier snack than the processed snacks I mentioned before. However it is also full of sugar – albeit the naturally occurring kind – which also damages teeth. Limit fruit and opt for veggie-based snacks where possible.

Drinks

It will come as no surprise to you that water is the very best drink that we can give to our children for their overall and oral health. It is sugar free, calorie free and great for staying hydrated. Sugary and fizzy drinks should be avoided as much as possible, and if you opt to give your child fruit juice, try and limit how often and opt for unsweetened varieties where you can.

Making brush-time fun

As I said at the start, getting your kids to take time out of their busy lives to brush their teeth can be a challenge. Making it a routine and making it fun are the best ways to ensure that they look after their oral health.

Ideally both children and adults should brush a minimum of twice per day and after each meal if at all possible, and you should do it for at least 2 minutes each time. That is a lot longer than most people realise and definitely much longer than most people brush for. Setting an alarm or using a timer is a good way to keep track, but I highly recommend using an egg-timer. Kids are fascinated watching the sand trickle away and the two minutes are quickly over for them. They are inexpensive and easy to find online. Another alternative is to find a song that they like that is at least two minutes long and ask them to brush for the duration of the song. They can even have a little dance around the bathroom whilst they do it!

Brushing should always be done in a circular motion so encourage your kids to make “train wheels” with brushes (with accompanying noises if necessary!) and use brushes with smaller heads to help them get to those harder to reach teeth. Battery-powered toothbrushes are also a great choice for helping children do an awesome job of brushing.

Other useful ways to encourage brushing include stickers and reward charts and allowing your children to pick out their own toothbrushes.

Don’t forget about the dentist!

As soon as your child has a number of teeth ensure that you register them with a dentist and start taking them for the recommended schedule for check-ups. Your dentist can ensure that your child’s teeth are in optimum health, your child will learn to feel comfortable in the environment, and going for an oral check up will quickly become an easy routine.

I hope that you have found this guide interesting and useful, and can use some of the ideas and information to make brush time fun for your children. For further, comprehensive guidance on oral health I recommend visiting this awesome website, diamondbraces.com.

livteethcleanPhoto: my 8yr old enjoying brush time!